Book Review: Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

 Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe is a sweet coming of age story set in the summer of 1987. 

Before we go any further into the review, there will be spoilers. Some are important to the plot. If you don’t want to be spoiled, then please, go read the book first and then come back. If you’ve already read the book, or you don’t care about spoilers, then please, read on. 

Aristotle, or Ari, is he likes to be called is full of rage. His family have kept this secret of why his older brother is in prison. His father, who went to Vietnam, can’t speak of the war or the horror’s he witnessed. 

When Dante offers to teach Ari how to swim, the two will become fast friends and eventually more.

I listened to the audiobook version, which is read by Lin-Manuel Miranda, pre-Hamilton fame. Lin’s voice is lovely, and as both characters speak Spanish, his voice suits the story quite well. For the most part, but we’ll get into that. 

Pro’s

Lin-Manuel Miranda* (Lin is also, sadly, a con. More on that later.)

A (mostly) positive coming of age story/ coming out story
The main characters 

Con’s

Lin-Manuel Miranda

The writing

The fact that the main characters are supposed to be 15-17

‘Gay kid gets beat up’ trope

The 80’s outdated terms for trans people

 The Problem of Lin-Manuel Miranda. 

As I said before, Lin’s voice is lovely to listen to. Lin, if you didn’t already know is Puerto Rican, and the characters are Mexican. So naturally, Lin suits the setting pretty well. However, both the book and audiobook came out in 2013.  Lin was 33 in 2013. Aristotle starts the book at age 15. 

Lin sounds like Lin. He sounds exactly like himself. I don’t hear an angry 15-year-old boy. Lin does try an accent for Dante but often slips into his normal voice. Then, when there are female characters you get this odd ‘Lin does a high pitched voice’ for the teen girls and lower, softer voice for the two mothers in the story. It took some getting used to and at times when his Dante accent slipped, and Lin’s voice returns. I can’t speak for anyone else but those times always took me out of the moment. 

Then you had the additional problem of Ari commenting how he and Dante have changed since the start of the book. Ari notices that his voice breaks and cracks more often. Towards the end of the book, Ari notes how his voice has deepened. Lin does nothing to reflect the vocal changes a teenage boy goes through. Has anyone’s voice got deeper? Maybe, but Lin’s hasn’t changed in all the hours he’s been speaking.  

I’m honestly not a fan of famous people trying to voice act like this unless they are professional voice actors. Famous people are good for publicity, sure, but can they voice act? Probably not. Lin, as much as I like you, you are not a voice actor.

The writing - Ok, listen. I know, as a writer myself, we all have ‘ticks’. Something that is unique to us and the way we write. That being said, let me show what a typical conversation between Ari and Dante looks like. 

‘Hi,’ I said.

‘Hi,’ He said.
‘I’m fifteen,” I said.
‘Same,’ He said. 

‘I go to school,’ I said.

‘Me too,’ he laughed. I laughed. We laughed together. Dante can always make me laugh. Dante. Dante. Dante. Dante. Dante.

‘I like you,’ I said.

‘I like you, too,’ he said. 

For seven hours. 

Seven. 

Hours.

I’m not usually a fan of the whole ‘said is dead’ piece of advice, but it wouldn’t hurt to change it up every now and then. 

Both Ari and Dante laugh. They don’t giggle, snort, chuckle, fall about in hysterics, howl with laughter, cackle or even snicker. Nope. They laughed. 

Words are repeated five or six times when the author is trying to emphasise something. Ari’s older brother is in prison. This is mentioned repeatedly throughout the book. At first, it’s interesting. The 110th time you hear, “my parents never talk about my brother, who is in prison,” you kinda stop caring. My mum used to tell me, ‘shit or get off the pot.’ That applies to storytelling too. Dangle your mystery, intrigue your readers, but for the love of God, tell them the answers! 

Ari and Dante begin this story before they turn 16. It ends just before Ari turns 17. Neither of them feel like teenagers. Yes, they swear and think about sex, and Ari gets a truck. Sometimes, with the way the dialogue is written, they seem much younger. If someone had told me Ari and Dante were 11-13, I would’ve believed that. Not only do they sound young, they act young.  At the time the book was published, the author was 59 years OLD. 

I just don’t believe that these two boys are the age they’re supposed to be in the book. I’m not saying you can’t write convincing teenagers when you’re in your late 50’s, but I am saying this dude can’t. 

As a queer person, there are many tropes I dislike and sadly, Ari and Dante uses one of the worst - towards the end of the book, Dante is beaten up and put in hospital. 

Yes, we’re in 1988. Yes, things were very different then. No, I don’t want to read about it in my gay awakening book. By the point Dante gets hurt, Ari has already been in hospital. 

Did they both have to get hurt? True, Ari did not get beaten up, but still. Let’s not have our gay characters beaten up for being gay. Think of something new. You’re a writer. Be creative. Try it, it’s fun. 

It’s from here we delve into the fun game of ‘did you have to use that term?’ Dante and Ari have a conversation about Ari’s brother (who is in prison in case you forgot.) It turns out, brother dearest killed two people - one of whom was trans. 

A lot of transphobic people claim that trans people ‘trick’ or ‘trap’ straight people into having sex with them by not disclosing what kind of genitals they have in the first ten seconds of meeting. This is a vile and disgusting opinion to have and it has caused the deaths of trans people for decades. In a fictional story, where the brother could have done anything to get himself in prison, the author picked, ‘killing a trans person’ and it only gets worse! 

During this talk, both Ari and Dante use a slur to describe the victim. Now, I know people will say, ‘it’s set in the 80s! People used that word a lot in the ’80s! And here’s the thing. I don’t give a rats ass. This book was published in 2013 and frankly, the author should have known better. Once again, you are a writer. There are a million ways you can say ‘my brother killed someone who was trans,’ without using slurs. 

This is also the reason I don’t want to use the author’s name. Yeah, you can google the title and find it, but I don’t want this person’s name on my blog. There is no good reason to use slurs in your writing. I don’t care what the setting is or what the excuse is. There is no place for it. Not now, not ever. 

With all that being said, I did like this book. Yes, the writing could’ve been stronger and less repetitive, but the heart of the story - Ari and Dante are beautiful. The way their friendship grows and blooms is so charming and I was rooting for them from the off. 

The background characters were nice, the parents especially had some good moments. The overall pacing was pretty decent. There was one moment where I zoned out and suddenly Ari was in hospital. However, the characters tell you what happened fairly often after the event, so it wasn’t a huge deal that I missed it. 

There isn’t much of a plot as this is a character-driven story. (The plot can be summed up as - two teens meet, go to school, fall in love.) That’s not a bad thing, but I do hope the sequel has more plot.

That’s right folks! It’s been 8 years, but Ari and Dante are getting a second book coming out on October 12 titled Aristotle and Dante Dive Into the Waters of the World. It’s 200 pages longer than the original, so hopefully, that means there is a plot this time!

Lin-Manuel Miranda returns to badly voice act his way through the audiobook. Oh, God. He’s done a fair bit of acting since 2013, maybe he’s learned how to do two different voices in that time. 

Overall, I’d give Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe 3.5/5.

What are your thoughts on the book? Let me know!